Summing up my profession

"When people are at war of their house is burned down, they may not be in the mood [to be interviewed] either, but its my job as a journalist to be insensitive for entertainment purposes." - Kim, character from U.S. television series Kath & Kim

James Wilson as Hulk?

Robert Sean Leanord... Hulk-in-progress.

Infrared Speed Oven

According to the endlessly informative but hopelessly confusing Google Analytics, the top source of traffic to this blog has been my post on ShamWOW!. A post written a week in advance and auto-posted while I went on a camping trip. To that end, do people want to hear my bemusings on TV products? Mmmmno. But that will not stop me. 

Why?

I saw the most amazing infomercial over the weekend. 

The Black & Decker Infra Wave Speed Oven is a revolutionary new oven. You know how some food takes too long in a regular oven, waiting for it to preheat? And how some foods - like nachos and pizza - don't taste the same when reheated in the microwave? Well, then the Speed Oven is for you! 

What's that? It's just a regular toaster oven? No, no. 

It is a toaster oven with Infrared technology. 

And presets, just like a microwave!

The commercial shows frozen food being cook to perfection in 20 minutes, no need for thawing. The InfraRed senses the food and it's computer gizmo's calculate how best to cook the food. They say it's technology used by the "best" upscale restaurants. And now it can be in your kitchen!

If you have any time this weekend, find a poor cable channel that fills their airtime with infomercials and try to catch one for this. I know it's tough, since most infomercials are for Gunthy Renker products changed my life, because, lipstick will do that.

It is tough to talk about a toaster oven Speed Oven without video or demonstrations, so please, take my word for it: it is amazing.

Brothers & Sisters and a Bad Robot

During last night's episode of Brothers & Sisters, sharp-eyed viewers such as myself may have noticed that the robot drawing by the "geeky magician" may have looked a little familiar. Did it ring a bell? Take another look:

Fans of a fair portion of modern television will recognize that drawing as the infamous "Bad Robot" production's signature Bad Robot.
See the resemblance? It's too uncanny to just be a coincidence, right? So what gives? Brothers & Sisters is not a J.J. Abrams/Bad Robot production. What's the connection?

To start, both Ron Rifkin and Balthazar Getty previously worked on Alias, a Bad Robot program. Patricia Wettig guest starred in the same show. Wettig's real-life husband, Ken Olin, is a producer for Brothers & Sisters and a guest star, and was previously a producer on Alias.

The J.J. Abrams connection continues. Sarah Caplan is also a producer for Brothers & Sisters, having previously worked on Felicity, Alias and Lost, all projects J.J. has been involved in.

About "24: Redemption"

And you thought a half-hour commercial was bad.

Have you seen the commercials on FOX Broadcast for 24: Redemption? It's a two-hour TV movie that is nothing more than an elaborate set-up/commercial for the new season. No, seriously. The movie was made after the first few episodes were filmed, in order to "tie things together." How great is Episode 1 if you have to make Episode 0?

Mary Lynn Rasjkub won't be in the prequel as feisty computer genuis Chloe O'Brian. Then, why bother?

Well, Powers Boothe makes a cameo as Daniels, the power-hungry Vice-President from last season. Peter MacNicol returns also. Cherry Jones makes her long-awaited debut as the shows first female president. Jones will also be in the new season, playing the same character. (Hey, odder things have happened. This is 24 we are talking about.)

Jon Voight is in this movie also. Although, without hearing any spoilers, I'm sure he will only make a "surprise" cameo as a twist ending before commercials. It will probably go something like this:

MOVIE VILLAIN: Mission success. 

(figure emerges from shadows. It's Jon Voight, he's playing a villain)

VOIGHT: GOOD. Proceed with the plan as scheduled.

(zoom up on Voight's face. The orchestra goes crazy with suspense. Cut to black.)

Sprague Grayden will be in this movie as well, but IMDb doesn't have her down for the season. That probably means her character dies. She's a very capable actress. Sadly, 24 isn't known for bringing out the best acting in people. Even the versatile Keifer Sutherland occasionally drones on like an automatic action robot. But the acting is not why most people watch the show anyways.

24: Redemption airs Nov. 23 on FOX. I'll watch it, because it is much healthier for me to hate a television show than anything else. Plus, I can watch 24 and Heroes and play the fun weekly game, "which lowered the bar for television quality this week?" It's a tough game.

Scary bedtime story

Well, this post may not have any pictures in it, but, it is a video that made me laugh. Ergo, it will make you laugh also.

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles is a television show set in a Terminator universe. In this episode, Sarah Connor (Lena Headly) had to kidnap a small child in order to save him from mistaken-identity-death-by-a-Terminator. The younger woman, Cameron (Summer Glau), is a 'good' Terminator, sent back from the future to protect the Connors. The show explores somewhat this Cameron, being a robot, trying to act human-like. Sort of a drama-version of 3rd Rock from the Sun. And the results are often awkward and inappropriate. Take a look:

It's official: Lifetime is in on the joke

Have you ever seen a commercial for a Lifetime Original Movie? Or ever heard of one? They are usually a few edits away from being great. And the acting, writing and production sometimes leaves a little something to be desired. 

While watching a rerun of Frasier on Lifetime, I saw a commercial for an upcoming original movie. And seeing how many seconds of a 0:30 spot are devoted to Harry Connick Jr. "running" down a hallway in a comical, Garth Marenghi's Darkplace-type way, I just cannot believe that Lifetime does not try to feed into it's own stereotype.

The first time I saw this commercial, with the hallway running, I bursted out laughing.

I still have a life, am living it

As warned, blogging has been cut down quite a bit since school has started. I am still alive, however. So that is good news.

I am taking 12 credits worth of classes, working about 12 hours a week, and spending time with my internship at Unnamed Media Company (UMC). And I do not feel that stressed out... yet. Any deviation from my schedule might do just that, however. 

Tuesday nights this summer were spent bowling with some friends. I have decided to keep that up over this semester, to ensure that I make at least some effort to socialize. Some semesters I bury myself in homework and barely see any friends - apart from the ones I work with - so that has been great for me as well. Except since the semester started, the stress has obviously kicked in and affected by bowling game, bringing me down from scoring 100+ a game to being fortunate to get 70 points. I think I need to use the bumpers.

I have two discussion classes this semester. These 400-level classes are spent with students doing reading and talking about what was read, while the teacher facilitates what goes on. This works great for one class where it is just four people talking. 

I have more or less adjusted to the Grand Valley State University Allendale campus. I know where my buildings are, and I think I know where all the other classes are. I can get from building to building in just a few minutes. Most buildings are not too big, either. Except for Mackinaw Hall, where one can expecting to find a shopping mall hidden inside that labyrinth. 

Grandpa J. had a small stroke. He's fine. He lost half his vision. That's about all I can say in a nutshell about that.

I assume the rest of the family is doing okay. I barely see them. 

The new television season is starting to come back. I have never missed 24 less. 

Heroes decided that "villains" means having some generic no-good-doers look menacing while everyone else becomes morally ambiguous. The Office decided that after receiving harsh criticism for their hour-long episodes last season to open this season with another hour-long installment. Smart! 

Bones has not yet found a replacement for Zach in the lab. This past week's episode seems to hint that we're just a season away from the serial-killer-apprentice being reinstated to the land of the squints. House remains as comfortable has it always has. If only they would update the theme song with the other half of their cast. Ugly Betty remains the brightest thing I ever did see. Now that the show is filmed in New York City, I can try to identify places they are filming at that I recognize. So far: Times Square, and maybe that sprawling graveyard, which were all over the ride from LaGuardia to Manhattan. 

I'm looking forward to the return of 30 Rock, Pushing Daisies and Private Practice. And Chuck, but, they debuted it one week prior to television broadcast, so it's already kind of come back for me.

Work is going fine at the Family Dining Establishment. People start, people leave, it's the perpetual revolving door. I get sad when people cut back on their hours. Then I remember I did the same this semester. It feels more wrong when others do that, though.

The internship at UMC is going good. A little... (complicated?) at times. But I am very fortunate to be working with some very nice people. I was afraid it would be a "stereotypical" newsroom with angry, egotistical people, but, I also have not met everyone. Those I have, do not fit the mold. Unless I am one of those people and I just don't recognize others like me.

I will probably be getting some more free time in a few weeks. The ratings for Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles have been hemorrhaging lately. If that gets cancelled, I'll gain an hour on Monday nights. Until Samantha Who? comes back, that is.

The rest of Fringe

FOX's newest show Fringe is okay. It was a good enough pilot, setting up some character dynamics.
However, I still don't know how a normal episode will play out.

There were elements in Fringe that were supposed to be scary, but were not. Do robotic arms freak you out? Then Fringe might scare you. Does brain wave manipulation enhanced by LSD to communicate telepathically freak you out? (It's a common nightmare, I know!) Then this episode may not have been for you.

I thought the show would be helmed by Joshua Jackson. It wasn't. He is just a supporting character. J.J. Abram's latest find, Anna Torv, is the main character. And that's fine. It's just not what I thought. (And that's my bad, I suppose.) Her character does not have the warmness of Keri Russel's Felicity, the range of Jennifer Garner's Sydney Bristow, or the helplessness of Evangeline Lilly's Kate Austen. The character was a little too "tough female detective," which not so much a slam against Anna Torv (who did well enough with her material), as it is against the direction of the character. I'll do better when I have my own shows, right?

The writers need to give the Joshua Jackson character A) something about him for us to like, B) less snarky remarks. We get that he's supposed to be the "audience's voice," but, he was too snarky. He made about ten too many snide remarks. Once they (the writers, producers, directors, and actor) find the character's voice, I'm sure it'll get better.

The veteran actor John Noble is going to be the breakout star of this show. The brilliant but confused fringe science expert that he plays brings the screen to a energetic life. Not to mention that he is one of the funnier, more unique comic relief characters that J.J. Abram's & co. have come up with.

With a few more episodes to find their footing, I think Fringe could be good. I don't think it's a show that, time-wise, I can make a weekly priority. But if it's on and I'm home, yeah, I might watch it. It looks like it'll be a good enough mystery program.

Jaw on the ground

I just sat down to watch FOX's new show Fringe. I've just hit pause at the 2:47 mark. Not because it is bad. In those 167 seconds, it established drama, fear, terror and sheer horror.

Fringe has been compared to The X-Files, which I hope is unfair, because Mulder and Scully, while iconic, where never that "fun" to watch. But the X-Files had some nasty episodes. The house episode with the inbreds? Nastiest hour of television I've seen. The guy who can swallow other people and regurgitate them fully healed of their diseases? That was gross. But, there was something that was on screen for about half a second that completely grossed me out.

As in, I had to take a break, because it was nasty.

I'm going to continue to watch Fringe. I hope it's good. It's got Lance Reddick, who plays a maybe-supervillian on Lost. And J.J.'s sci-fi shows have always been very well cast, so I'm sure the characters will be very alive and engaging.

But... After a long day of work, with a growing pile of homework, this was perhaps the last thing I needed to see. Oh man... My jaw!

EDIT: Added the title card. It's neat.

Fall TV Preview

Here it is... the shows I will watch, and the shows that I think are good. (They are not always one and the same.)

Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles - This show took a few episodes to pick up in it's inaugural season, but by the end it had come into it's own as a compelling character drama. I have yet to see a Terminator movie, and the television series is not quite canon with the movies themselves (nor are the movies 'canon' with themselves, either), which may make it more accessible to folks like me. Summer Glau shines as the female terminator sent to protect mankind. And Lena Headly (playing the weary, weathered mom of the future hope for mankind) can take sub-par material and make it sublime. The show is dark, it's gritty, but it's compelling. It cares about the human drama. For a show with robots, that's really something.
This season will deal with Skynet. The world will end, EVENTUALLY!!!

Pushing Daisies - This hour-long dramedy is like a grown-up version of a Saturday morning kid's cartoon. It is colorful, fun, usually harmless and one big fun ride. (Same can be said for ABC Family's The Middleman, but according to Nielsen, you guys never watched it, so how would you know?) *ahem* The show, whose premise is very high-concept, is completely approachable. It is a show that will eventually be used to describe something else. As in, you can only say "Pushing Daisies is like a mix between a Rode Dahl book and a Tim Burton movie," someday you'll be saying "this is a little like Pushing Daisies." It's colorful, charming, sometimes over-the-top, but always funny and always entertaining. The feeling it leaves you with is like eating a piece of your favorite pie - and going back for seconds. Except you don't have to break out the Tums afterwards.

Bones - This show already returned, but it is still one worth checking out. It's a crime procedural that focuses more time on the dynamic and 'tension' (Moonlighting-type tension) between the two leads. And then time is spent with relationships with the people in the lab. And while they will show you completely gross human remains, I will laugh more at the humor in an episode of Bones than will laugh during an hour-long episode of The Office. It may not be sophisticated, but the show is very comfortable with itself and what it is. And that's entertainment.

House - I love/hate this show. When the show breaks out of it's mold, it can be something incredibly special. The two-part finale (the bus accident) was some of TV's finest hours. When Dr. House had to help out that lady stranded in the ice shelter? Compelling and - pardon the pun - chilling. But when it sticks to it's default formula (almost kill the patient three times then get the right diagnosis), it is tedius and often unamusing. In those cases, it's usually just the rare sparring between House and his comedic foil Wilson that keep the energy of the show afloat. But the show is worth watching, especially for when you stumble upon those rare gems of episodes. They are truely something to behold.
This upcoming season will look into the all-too-common question of, how can I rebuild my friendship with you when I kind of killed your girlfriend?

Heroes - The show that is described by many - very unfairly - as the anti-Lost. Except it is as complicated. And has by now probably more characters than Lost ever will. But enough about who Ali Larter plays on the show! (The actress plays a character with multiple personalities.) The show runners promised to fix their mistakes in the second half of season one for a terrific season two. Well, season two sucked. Big time. So now they are promising to fix the mistakes again. And part of that includes adding villians, which is a novel idea for a good vs. evil-type show. This show was good in season one. But then there was Hiro and the cherry blossoms. Claire became more like a character from The Hills than the Claire we saw before. And Parkman still did not do much at all.
I have seen spoilers for this season. And I hear the premiere is excellent. But I am very cautious about the storylines I have heard about. VERY cautious.

Chuck - This show is about a tech-support worker who accidentally gets a top-secret government database inside his brain. One of the main jokes on the show is that the main character, Chuck, is so geeky that he is a loser, and that's why it's amazing a stunning woman is sent to protect him. Except, the actor, Zachary Levi, is not exactly underperforming in the look's department. And Chuck's personality is, well, just lovable, not that geeky. But in this type of show, it doesn't matter! Because it is the characters and their interactions that carry the show through. This is the type of show that may not even care much about consistency in later seasons. And it wouldn't matter. As long as they keep up the fun energy and the engaging relationships, it will remain one of my favorite shows.

Brothers & Sisters - I watch this show. I don't recommend it. It has some of the best acting on television, to date. But really, I can't - in good conscience - recommend this show. (But until the soap opera plots become too much to handle, I'll still make it my guilty pleasure.) The show is about the Walker family. Kitty and Tommy are Republicans, the rest are Democrats. Kitty is married to a Republican Senator who just pulled out of a Presidential bid. Tommy cheated on his wife, which was probably easy material for actor Balthazzar Getty. Said wife lost one of her babies and suffered depression. Kevin is gay, and can't keep a solid relationship for more than half a season. (But he got married in the season finale, so, we'll see.) Sarah is divorced, lost her kids in the settlement and is now managing her father's business, which may be crumbling underneath her. Justin is a recovering alcoholic and a war veteran. Rebecca was thought to be a long-lost sibling, but isn't, which means she and Justin can hook up, which is WEIRD. Uncle Saul, about 65 now, just decided to come out of the closet. And the patriarch, Nora (Sally Field), does better at keeping her own family in line than her own life. Although she has dated Danny Glover and Chevy Chase, so, she's not doing that terribly.
And the whole thing is complicated by the late patriarch's mistress, who holds a considerable interest in the family company. Awkward.
Again, as you can see, it is really not a show for everybody.

Private Practice - The show I am looking forward to the most. And here's why: it is an hour of entertainment. You don't have to think. You don't have to wonder, worry, or have any expectations. It's not a show for kids (much like, well, the rest of primetime), but it is definately a guilty-fun hour to watch.

Preview of fall TV preview

I'll soon give some quick thoughts on what I'll be watching on television this fall. I think I just realized what show I missed the most, and it kind of surprised me. And it will probably surprise you, too.

Mad about what?

I watched about seven minutes of Mad Men last night. Mad Men, a show about sexist, racist, egotists Madison Avenue ad executives a few decades ago, is heralded as one of the best contemporary television shows around, by almost every television critic.

I don't know why.

After the commercial break, I had no incentive to tune back. Granted, it was in the middle of an episode. That did not help me to immerse myself at all.

But there seemed to be pauses so long they could almost be passed off as being a vintage episode of The Hills. And "vintage" is a great way to describe the production values. It felt like watching a decades-old episode of Masterpiece Theater, produced on a BBC budget smaller than an episode of Doctor Who.

And I saw two scenes with one character, which, it was tough to say without having seeing the other episodes of the series, but I didn't feel like I was watching a story progress. I was watching someone's very boring day.

I know the character of Don Draper is supposedly this new iconic television character. And maybe he is, I didn't get to see much of him. But the seven minutes I saw of Mad Men was maddeningly boring. And this is coming from someone who can watch episodes of Masterpiece Theater and Mystery!.

Maybe I need to see a full episode. But I can't imagine wanting to.

I also recently tried watching an episode of Saving Grace on TNT. I could only make it through the opening act. It involved Grace, a bartender, giving drinks to her customers. Then there was some dancing on top of the bar. Someone got naked. Maya Gallo was there, and the joke seemed to be that she was a bad waitress because she couldn't flaunt her stuff as well as the others. Ha? And... that was about it. And then the weird, trippy theme song. I totally did not get it.

But I understand Lost. And I watch 24, Heroes, Chuck and Pushing Daisies. So it's not like I don't get the avant-garde television shows on today. But those shows? Uh-uh.

Quick update

I have started school this week. I am now a Grand Valley State University student. Their sports team is the Lakers, but, I think I will always be one of the Grand Rapids Community College Raiders at heart.

One interesting thing about GVSU is, I pay more money for less instruction. For every credit you take at GRCC, you get one hour of instruction. So a 3 credit class would meet for a total of 3 hours, every week. And the teachers don't like to get our early, because you paid for three hours/week, you should get your moneys worth for these three credits. Well, at GVSU, a 3 credit class meets for 2 and a half hours a week. I am not yet quite sure why this is. It's kind of nice, spending less time in class. (Which is the worst part of collegiate education, next to homework.) But it's an interesting shift, one that I'm not yet sure how to respond to.

I cut back on hours at Unnamed Family-Oriented Tourist-Trap Restaurant, to do an internship at Unnamed Media Organization. So I will be juggling a full credit load of classes, work hours, plus an internship. If I blog less this fall, you now know why.

In other news, the new television season starts up again very soon. I still have to figure out which shows I'll watch on the same night as they air, which shows I'll catch up on over the weekend, and which shows I'll save for summer. I am a little bit of a television nerd, so, this is a very important decision for me to make. Monumental, even.

That's the short and sweet of it. More posts to (hopefully) come later.

A "Middle" discussion

Alan Sepinwall, of The Star-Ledger, had the opportunity last week to interview Javier Grillo-Marxuach, one of the great television writers of our time. JG-M has written for Jake 2.0, Charmed, Lost, Medium and now The Middleman. (And yes, he wrote for Charmed AND I still consider him a great writer.) He is also a master producer and and all-around imaginative genius. (I'll take my $20 now, Javier.)

The Middleman is a throwback to campy spy shows. It's everything you thought the movie Get Smart with Steve Carrell could be, but with more fast talk and pop culture references than The Gilmore Girls and Psych put together. The show also creates many imaginative villains and one-episode characters and gives them enough funny lines to say that it feels like an episode of Arrested Development. (It even uses the familiar tonal "beep" and black square to block swear words, which, like on AD, are used for comedic relief, without even needing to hear the words said.)

The problem with this show is this: No one is watching. Or, at least, not enough people. Which is saddening. If you took the best parts of Batman, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer, Arrested Development, Gilmore Girls, Psych, and Men in Black, you would start to see The Middleman emerge. It's no-nonsense attitude is never condescending, always accessible and the characters go through meaningful, life-learning lessons that never feel like an after-school special. In other words, real characters learn real lessons and it makes for good TV. Javier, being the show's creator, has the best words to talk about the show:

I know that everybody in TV says this, but the characters come first, and I have a very specific attitude about how these characters should behave towards each other. They're not cool, they're unabashed about being themselves, and they don't have an internal censor. I feel it's important that these characters not be losers, they can communicate with each other and solve their problems in constructive ways. A lot of popular culture thrives on a lot of meanness. This is a show that's aggressively anti-mean. The way that the characters resolve problems has a positivity to it. When you see all of the villains in our show, they're all tremendously misguided. They didn't start out trying to be bad.

In a way, all of the characters in the show are evolving into the adult state of being kind. That's what the show is about, which is why the show's take on evil isn't the same as everyone else's take, where evil is a metaphor for the darkness each of us carries deep within ourselves. On our show, evil is the product of people who refuse to become better.

I know, that's pretty heady stuff for a show that has a woman fighting a flying fish.

So what if the show gets cancelled? After all, the show is nowhere near as popular as other ABC Family offerings, such as Greek, Lincoln Heights, or the newcomer The Secret Life of the American Teenager. ("Secret Life..." now pulls in equal-to-or-better numbers than The CW's Gossip Girl, which is considered to be a smash hit, an almost unthinkable feat for the basic cable network.) Javi remains upbeat about the possibility of cancellation:

I'm infinitely optimistic. The word I have from ABC Family is they are interested in finding some way to continue the show. After what happened with "Jericho," with "Firefly," a guy in my position can't not be optimistic. If there isn't a life for it at ABC Family, maybe another network, and if it doesn't work on another network, maybe on DVD. Plus, I have the right to do the comic book at any time I choose.

As far as my personal involvement with the Middleman, I waited 11 years to put the show on the air my way, I can wait to get it to another place, and if I don't, honestly, I have no regrets. It has been 12 episodes made lovingly, hand-crafted, by people who truly believe in the product. If at the end of the day, I have to walk away from it, I won't walk away from it crying in my beer about how I didn't get to tell my story.

I'm happy that Javi would be satisfied with just twelve episodes of this show. I would not be. This is one of those rare gems of a TV show, like Lost or Pushing Daisies, that is very unique in it's execution and remains a summer favorite of mine.

The Middleman airs Monday nights at 10 P.M. ET on ABC Family.